Thursday, May 05, 2005

Who are the Mayonnaise Five?

And how did they earn a drinking holiday?

See, I was wondering that one myself. Cinco de Mayo. Putting my 2 years of high school Spanish to work I came up with a translation- Five of Mayo (short order chef slang for mayonnaise).

I got to wondering and did some research. Seems these five people defeated the French in Mexico. Yes, it took only 5 people to defeat the French army. I am shocked it too that many! All because they didn't like hollandaise sauce.

I don't particularly care for made up drinking holidays. For the most part, they are stupid. Why should I go out and drink margaritas because of the success of the Mayonnaise Five? Not that I am against having some margaritas today (and if anyone calls and "pressures" me to do so, hey, I guess I would have to- hint hint).

What I am against is companies focusing on ethnic holidays to their benefit. Face it, Corona probably could care less of the Mayonnaise Five. But if sells more beer for them, then they are all over it. But are they giving money to the Mayonnaise Five Foundation? Are they spreading the profits? If not, it is egg on their face. I say we give them Hell Man(s)!!!

Ok, stupid part of the post is over.

I just heard they may be another bear sighting. Close to where I work. Don't worry. Action StB is on the case with any updates.

So if you are Marquette University alumni, are you canceling your annual gift to them? The Gold? BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Who came up with this great idea, the same guy running the Packers draft? Everyone is expecting them to either change the name back to the Warriors or keep the Golden Eagles and they create their own, 0ne that makes no sense. Best yet, they claim to have done a lot of research, polls, etc. over the last year and the board of trustees was unanimous in their choice. They go as far as saying that "the Golden Eagles nickname and found it boring, weak and too common". And the Gold is exciting, strong and unique? The picture accompanying the article is classic. I personally like the guy laughing his ass off in the background. Once again, political correctness has backfired and made everyone unhappy.


J. Gambino said...

The Myth: Cinco de Mayo celebrates Mexico’s independence from Spain.

The Facts: Mexico actually gained its independence from Spain on September 16, 1821. Forty years later, the French invaded. On May 5, 1862, heavily armed French legions encountered a beleaguered Mexican army at the Battle of Puebla. Led by General Ignacio SeguĂ­n Zaragoza, the outnumbered and outarmed Mexicans fought off the French invasion. Although French reinforcements eventually conquered Mexico City, their rule was short-lived, and the bravery of the Mexican army is celebrated on this day.

As far as I know, there was never any sauce involved.

James Wigderson said...

I can't decide if "Marquette Gold" sounds like a bag of pretzels, a bottle of tequilla or a type of grass grown by Carl the assistant groundskeeper.

James Wigderson said...

I've got it! Marquette Gold urinal cakes!