Thursday, August 20, 2009

Swallowing a leech

I had a nice sloppy Bacon BBQ Burger for dinner last night. It tasted good but I ate it too fast. In fact I had the first bite so quickly after getting it off the grill that I burned the back of my mouth. I could feel it soon after I finished eating. Swelled flesh hanging down in the back of my mouth. Wait, that doesn’t sound right. I tried to ignore it the rest of the night but it annoyed me. When I was brushing my teeth curiosity got the better of me. I opened wide and took a look in the mirror.

There was a big black splotch in my mouth. At first I thought it looked like a big leech on the back of my throat. Hmm…the meat wasn’t that old. At second glance it looked like I had a dark piece of lettuce or a black jelly bean stuck there. I took a finger and pushed it a bit just to be sure. It didn’t occur to me that I had eaten neither a jelly bean nor a salad for dinner. I then got out the flash light to take a look. I now got a view of a nice blood blister in mouth. Beautiful.

This morning, I woke up and noticed the swelling had gone down. It still felt a bit tender but not bad. I took the flashlight and got in front of the mirror to take another look. No dark blotch this time. It was just a tad redder than the pink around the area. My first thought was I swallowed the leech in my mouth. My second thought was the human body is pretty amazing.

Ice cream update:
I had some ice cream yesterday! Wait, I didn’t. That wasn’t real ice cream. Those Weight Watcher bars taste like shit. I proceeded to leave a note thanking them for the ice cream but politely asked they clear out the rest of it so I could have my ice back. To my surprise this morning, the note was gone. Sadly there wasn’t a reply either but most of the ice cream is gone. One bar and those 3 damn singles remain. I must say I am surprised that they are eating them. I was certain they would be tossed in the refrigerator waste land never to be eaten again. Doesn’t matter. I will toss whatever is left by Monday. If I don’t help myself again that is.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Luv the double entendre but you will still be hearing from our lawyers.

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