Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Healing from a parade

I felt like a beaten mule yesterday. I was slightly hungover. My shoulder and knew were in pain and feeling tight. And I had to be at work for a meeting in the afternoon.

When I got home I just fell on my couch and zonked out. I knew a little rest would cure my ills. Sure enough, it did. I feel much better this morning. I guess tossing back hand grenades- Mickey's Malt Liquor for those of you not in the know- can slam you down.

Add in "carrying" a Tin Soldier balloon in a parade as the wind does its best to rip him out of your hands and the shoulder gets its own workout. I probably shouldn't blame the wind as much as the two short women on the other side of the balloon that had no friggin' clue about what was happening or what they needed to do to guide the balloon down the parade route.

Its quite simple. Pay attention to the balloon captain. Ok, I don't know if that is what she is called but that is what she did. She gave instructions as we went down the street. She guided us when to stop/start, when to move to a side when there were trees/street signs/lights handing over the route, where the wind would certainly swirl and when we needed to hold on tight. Follow her directions. Also make sure the balloon doesn't hit the ground. Move in and lift as needed. I tell ya, Balloon 101 ain't that hard.

But these two broads were busy texting and being part of the parade. They each clamped down the ropes pretty tight, wrapping it around their forearms. This prevented the balloon from going higher in the air. The solider had to be upright, perpendicular to the ground. But they seemed to keep him leaning to the right and forward. One even complained we were moving too fast. Proof that she wasn't paying attention to the balloon captain.

Volunteering to help guide a balloon for a parade was quite an experience. It now gives me a good story to use on strippers in Vegas. What do you do for a living? I own a parade balloon company. I make the balloons and train people how to properly use them during the parade. Sponge Bob Squarepants made me a fortune! Sold 3 dozen of them bastards to cities around the country. You don't want to know how much I made on that little sonabitch! It is obnoxious!

These pains make me happy it is a short work week. For once I am not working this Friday so I can lay around and watch football for 4 days. Too bad I can't take the following Monday off.

1 comment:

AletaR said...

Let us know how that Vegas thing works out for you.