Tuesday, June 23, 2009

As the sound of the tone, please leave a message

I received an interesting message on Saturday. One could say there were two of them but only one is sitting on an answering machine at home. The first was occurred at a friend’s house. His wife still stays in touch with an ex of mine. She mentions that every time she sees her, she is always asking about me. Apparently she isn’t too thrilled with the rich guy she is seeing. Something about wanting to get married but he doesn’t. Last I heard the rich guy was still married and didn’t want to lose everything in a divorce. Even if he did get divorced, he probably lost a bundle in the process. I sure don’t blame him for not wanting to get in that predicament again. Let’s just say she is not one to not wander around when lonely.

After watching the fights at my friend’s house I came home to find a message on my old answering machine. Yes, I have an old answering machine hooked up to the phone at home. This is the phone the cable company just installed; the one I didn’t want but took because it lowered my bill. The phone number that has been given to no one. The phone number I don’t intend to give it out or use it much. The only way you will get this number is if you hijack it from a call I make to you. So I was shocked to have a message on this number.

I hit the button and hear some moaning. Then a voice tells me “I have a (muffled word) cock inside me….more moaning…I am going to come all over it….louder moaning…” Wow! Steamy. Of course I had to listen to it again to see if I can recognize the voice. As I do I think how it sounds forced. This girl is lying to me. There is no way she has a cock inside her as she is leaving this message. Thus she cannot be coming all over it. I feel a bit of a letdown.

The next day I play it again and still don’t have a clue of who she is. I then begin to think it over a bit. Who calls and leaves a message like that when they don’t know if they are calling the right person, especially when the outgoing message is a generic one? I must be pretty damn certain of who I am calling if I am leaving a message like that. I then began to wonder who she was trying to call and if she got mad because that guy (or girl) didn’t acknowledge having received such a dirty call.

Maybe I will get another one. I will keep my toes crossed!


Hey Jo said...

Look at your tv. The caller ID shoudl be listed there of the number who called. Maybe that will help you track down the mystery woman.

Diarrhea of the Mouth said...

It was me...I was hoping you blog about it so I can let you know how I like to leave dirty messages on your voicemail.

StB said...

Really? That was the best you could do? Disappointment.