Friday, July 24, 2009

Survey says...

I am likely to be in trouble at work by this time next week. It will be the result of a misunderstanding and I get the feeling I won’t win. Though there wasn’t any screwing around from my side of the fence, it will be construed that I wasn’t taking something seriously.

We have all received those emails from friends. The 20 questions about you favorite sandwich, restaurant, movie, book, etc. I hate them and do not reply. In fact, when one of the questions is “Of all the people you have sent this to, who is least likely to respond?” I am just about always the answer.

This did one of these at work and made it mandatory that you complete it. I put it off for a couple weeks until my boss handed me the ultimatum. I read each of the questions first before I answered them. I really wanted to give a bunch of bullshit answers. It was killing me to answer them without screwing around. Hobbies? Alligator wrestling, bra inspector, keg drainer, President of the Degenerate Gambler Society of America (or DiGSA as we member like to call it). Favorite movie? The Devil in Miss Jones Pt 2. I could go on but you have the idea.

I began to give real answers and I did. I answered honestly and truthfully with all seriousness. But here is the problem. They asked some questions that I gave the same answer to. What is your favorite beverage, snack, or candy? Beer. How do you like to relax? Beer. How do you like to spoil yourself? Beer.

I have this feeling someone is going to complain that I made this survey into a joke. If I was going to make it a joke I would have answered the favorite store answer with Discount Liquor. I enjoy beer. Is there a crime against that? Well, not yet but the president needs to pay for healthcare and I figure he will begin to tax the shit out of alcohol soon.

So I think I have a week to prepare my defense. Or a week to marry a porn star and get fired. Wow! What the hell are the people running this town thinking? They are going to be sued big time. I don't care if the town attorney claims it was done legally, it is a simple case of discrimination. Like marrying a porn star is the worst thing in the world this guy could have done. I guess pedophiles rank higher. What if they found out this guy was married to another guy? In this day and age they probably would have given him a promotion. I hope he not only sues the city- something I rarely advocate- but then turns around and runs for mayor.

Drinking for Jesus kicks up again this weekend. St. Johns in Greenfield is the place to be. Say hi to the Lord with a cold one.

4 comments:

AletaR said...

May I ask why you were given this survey in the first place? We were given one a few years ago and a handful of people completed them. We were not hounded if they weren't turned in. It's really none of their business what your hobbies are. Or am I wrong?-

StB said...

yes, you may ask.

J. Gambino said...

If you are able to defend your answers, then I think you will be fine. If you honestly get into trouble, give me a call. I will talk to them.

In regard to the porn star thing, Back in '79 or '80, my aunt married a black man. A major outdoors/camping store in Milw. where she worked, fired her because of it. Why my aunt did not get rich off of this? I do not know.

Hey Jo said...

Do you really care about your other co-workers enough to want to know all the stuff about them? If I want to know how they spend their free time or what their favorite beverage is, I'll ask them straight out.

Maybe you can use the invasion of privacy defense.