Thursday, December 20, 2007

Cat scratch fever and other thoughts before I get drunk

The cat was at it again. Waking me up early with his meowing for food. I knew there would still be some in the dish so I just knocked the cat off the bed. It wasn't just the meowing that has been bothering me lately. It has been the scratching. The cat will begin to scratch his jaw and head and go on for about 15 seconds. When he is on the bed, he will make the whole damn thing shake and thus, wake me up. I have checked for fleas or any other bugs he could have but don't see anything. I think it just feels good for him to do that. Guess if he still had his balls he would be licking rather than scratching.

Some of hoping this is it, but it isn't. No, this is not the big "implosion" every football fan is begging for. It is quite simple. Terrell Owens said exactly what millions of Cowboys fans across the country were thinking.

T.O. had just finished saying he was looking forward to sipping mai tais and
looking at bikinis when I asked for his thoughts about Simpson. Here's the
Me: "Speaking of looking at bikinis, what do you think about all
the hubbub about Jessica Simspon and Tony Romo?"
T.O.: "Right now, Jessica Simpson is not a fan favorite in this locker room or in Texas Stadium." [reporters laugh]
Me: "Why not in this locker room?"
T.O.: "I think with everything that has happened, and obviously the way Tony played and the comparison between her and Carrie Underwood, I think a lot of people feel like she's probably taking his focus away. Other than that, she was at the top of my list until last week." [reporters laugh after last line; T.O. had a straight
face during the first sentence]
Me: "She looks good, but you want to see her on TV and not at Texas Stadium."
T.O., playing to the crowd: "Oh, I've got a message for her when we make the playoffs. Just stay tuned." [reporters laugh as he walks off]
For once, T.O. is right. Now is not the time for Romo to let the little head start thinking for the big head. The Deadskin game next week won't be easy. Nor will the Panther game this Saturday. The 'Boys needs to stay focused and overcome these injuries.

On another Cowboys note, the NFL was right to suspend Roy Williams. I do not understand Coach Phillips reasoning that he should not have been suspended because he didn't land on the player's legs. That is reaching. Get the game out of the way and begin to tackle like everyone else.

As I played poker last night, I had the new game show Duel on in the background. I had watched the show on Tuesday night and thought it was ok, especially considering there was jack on TV. But there was one really annoying trend with the program. The host is a guy from ESPN, Mike somebody (Greenburg??). He does a good job. Is likable. But he doesn't need to go for the cliffhanger inflection just before every freakin' commercial. It is bad enough there are like a bazillion commercial breaks during Duel (there is one every 5 minutes), but you do not have to go through the suspense routine for each one. Every time it is "And if the answer is D, liquor muffins, the duel is over and the stripper (he refers to the contestants by their vocation) will move on. Is the answer, D, stripper???? We will find out after this break!!!" Very fuckin' annoying!

It is a very quiet time of the year at work. A couple hours of getting things done followed by long lulls. I wish I could play poker at work. Anything to get the time to fly by.
I may be spending time at this site today, Tacky Christmas Yards. One quick favorite is the nativity scene that has Santa Claus and some snowmen in attendance. Stay classy!

Bored at work add on during lunch:
Two of my favorite shows during the past summer/fall are coming back on Vh1. Scott Baio's show is back but slightly different. He is no longer single and has knocked up his old lady. So now it looks like he is taking parenting courses or something like that. The first run of him deciding if he could handle being married was interesting because he seemed like a regular guy. Someone who would use his celebrity to get things but could mellow out with anyone. Plus there were huge benefits to being his wing man.

The other one, Rock of Love with Bret Michaels is back because it worked so good the first time. Seriously, why does anyone think they can find the one that is meant for them in a reality show? I hope the "whores" "sluts" "gold diggers" "strippers" "blow job queens" "contestants" at least know him this time. Last season it appeared they went to some casting agency at the last minute to get women. Most didn't have a clue he was the lead singer for Poison, let alone in a rock band.

4 hours of madness to go. I am so bored I even forwarded an email of an elf mooning people to some friend. That is how bored I am.

I wish the dive bar had wifi. I would get myself a laptop just so I could play poker at the bar tonight. Well, actually for just a little while. I guess the karaoke would drive me away.

Milwaukee police want to get tougher on people in non-fatal shooting crimes. I have an idea. Why not shoot the guilty person? Shoot them once for each bullet they fired. If that doesn't deter them from doing it again, I do not know what will. Worked for Bronson.

Sex and beer, sex and beer, are the two things we hold dear. Sex and beer, sex and beer, are the things we like 'round here.

I have an ice cold beer in my hands now. Sadly, it is of the root variety.

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