Nothing to see here, move along

I have all kinds of stuff jamming through my head right now but nothing really good to talk about. Not the shooting in the neighborhood park on Monday.

Nor the rain we are getting once again. My lawn will look like a jungle by Saturday.

Nor how my boss is panicking once again because one person out of 400 did not receive an email and now we need to double check all these things.

Nor how I am sad that metal month on Vh1 is over. Some good stuff for headbangers was on all May. It made me pull out some Iron Maiden to enjoy once again. That was replaced by Guns n Roses this morning. I don't think I have listened to the Appetite disc in at least 8 years. Seriously.

Nor how my tenant is becoming a bum and how I will need to get tough with them.

Nor how I walked through the food store- a place where the freaks always crack me up- and didn't really get anything inspiring to eat. I did notice that the only vegetables I had at the checkout were the ones on the pizza. Much different from the vegan in front of me. I don't think she liked me putting my meat right up against her parsley.

Nor the fact that I got the band wrong when Gambino called. Well sort of. She needed to know who sang Tell Me What You Want. I told her I wasn't certain but I knew it was one of two bands, UFO or Zebra. I went with UFO though it didn't feel right. As I was driving I began to think of the other Zebra hit, Who's Behind the Door and knew I had the group wrong. I was going to call her back but instead called my mother.

Nor about how the Zebra's singer's screeching vocal style will now be stuck in your head as you hear "Tell me what you waaaaaant, tell me what you waaaaaant" or "Who's behind the dooooooooooor" over and over, just about driving you nuts.

Nor about how I may not be using "nor" correctly. Should it be "or"? Know what? I don't care.

No. I won't talk about any of those things. Don't quite know what to talk about. I guess I got nuthin.

Effortless

That one word is a good way to describe how a good drinking session goes. Before you begin to realize it, it is hours later, you have had a great time with friends, and there is just a hint of slur in your words.

Sunday was an effortless day. It started out inconspicuously. The weather was nice. Sunny, warm, would be approaching 90. Usually a friend has a party up at the bar for the Indy race. This year, no one really knew if he was doing it again or not. Word had not been put out. I figured at the least I can do a drive by, see if his car was out and stop on in to see what was going on. The usual crowd had gathered and drinks were being served. I guess some things are just automatic and do not need invitations anymore.

Now, I don't really watch racing. I am more up on the drinking portion. I know enough of the drivers to debate a topic or give someone shit. I had Dixon in the pool. Guy spent the entire day in 3rd place before falling off at the end. Wuss.

Towards the end of the race, Randy wanted to get some poker going so some of us morphed onto two tables for some hold'em. This is the point where things started to get interesting. Somewhere along they way, it was decided that everyone should be drinking Captain and Cokes to try and win the tent and sleeping bags they were giving away. It had also been decided to stuff the box with my name. Hey, I ain't one to try and fight a crowd.

It was at this time that the Indy race ended and the Nascar race started and ended and I had filled out dozens of slip to win some camping gear. Lisa arrived out of nowhere to quench her thirst. We caught up on things. Apparently she has been bit by the biking bug as well and went out and got a bike just like everyone else. Thankfully she realizes she doesn't need a helmet.

Later, Jim and Brian would show up again after heading out to the church festival. The time had really slipped on by. I looked at my watch and saw it was 11. It had been an eleven hour binge that seemed like barely a couple of hours. After finishing another pint, I decided it was time to take off. Actually my wallet had decided as I didn't have enough left for another Captain. Jim pinched the keys out of my hand and insisted he drive me home. Kids, if you have been a sponge at a bar soaking up rum for 7 hours, let someone drive you home. You should be happy that they care enough to see you the next day.

I also realized I had broken one of the laws of drinking. I had forgotten to eat anything. Picking away at peanuts in the snack bowl doesn't really count. But that was all I ate on Sunday. Well, except for a lime wedge or two.

I spent my Monday off doing yardwork. Or at least trying. I went to my mother's to mow the lawn. Either she was sleeping or had decided not to let me into the house as no one responded when I knocked on the door. Maybe she was at my sister's house. I went back home and pulled out the weed eater and started trimming the grass around the trees, post, house, etc. I got about halfway finished when the line went flying off the end. I had one length of house to do and I run out of the fricken' line. That bit. So I retired inside away from the heat to relax, play poker and watch a classic Dr. Who dvd.

Hey, if the powers that be do not want me to cut the grass then why should I fight them?

I have come to the conclusion that one of my tenants is pretty damn stupid. It began to rain yesterday afternoon. I noticed he windows were down on this car. I then realized that the windows are usually down a lot when it is raining. Has he no common sense to notice the rain and go put the windows up? Nope. The Xbox is too important to him.

Blessed

Blessed be the soldiers that are serving our country abroad. And blessed be the friends we have that keep us safe at home.

Say a prayer for our soldiers around this world of ours. And the friends here at home, who love you too.

Satanic music at the church

The 2006 Drinking for Jesus Tour got off to a nice start last night. Immaculate Heart of Mary was the setting for cold beer, some classic rock, and people watching. The weather lent a hand as well as it was not too cold nor too warm. Just right.

Rhythm Method was on the stage playing their guitar centered brand of music focusing on the 70s and 80s. They may possibly be the only band I have ever heard try to tackle Zeppelin's Kashmir and do a good job. Word it they are calling it quits after this year. Sad. They have two talented ax men that can tackle the likes Boston, Toto, REO Speedwagon, Zeppelin, Genesis, Night Ranger, and Van Halen. They don't do the same crap that all the other pop bands want to do. No, you won't be Coming on Eileen here.

The part that I personally liked was they played Runnin' With the Devil. On church grounds. Maybe it is only I that finds this amusing. I wonder if anyone setting the festival up ever looks at the playlist to possibly prevent something like that from happening.

I will have to take a look at the schedule to find out where I will be Drinking for Jesus next weekend. You all should try this. That way you can tell everyone you went to church. You may want to leave the "and I got smashed" part out of it when speaking with parents, though.

Drinking for Jesus 2006- Let the beer flow!

Looks like the Drinking for Jesus Tour begins tonight. The location: the Immaculate Heart of Mary in West Allis. The band: Rhythm Method. The beer: Cold.

Just need to get through one more hour of work and then weekend bliss!

I also plan to try some new brews this weekend. How about some suggestions?

Holiday weekends

So it has begun to feel like a nice long weekend is here. I think it took the 10 hours days to make it feel like it was earned. I have worked too much this week. I need a good weekend to lay around, drink, and get some stuff done.

It really hit me yesterday. It was quarter past 5 and I was still at work. I should have been home by now, cooling down from a workout, and thinking about cold beer. Instead, I am getting out of a meeting, looking at the rain that is coming down, and grumbling about putting the top back up on the car.

I made a quick wise decision. Bar. The only consideration was whether to stop at home to change clothes (I did). I got to the bar just past 6. By 6:50 I had 4 pints of Captain and Cokes in me. And H does not make them weak either. My brain got what it needed. A pool to swim in.

I had a couple of beers after that before heading out. I always want to be out of Big Mommas before the karaoke clowns show up.

My day at work looks pretty good. No big items to do. Some minor review. Boss was on a plane leaving before I got out of bed. The only thing I need to worry about is whether she calls because she is in an airport bored and just wants to talk. God bless caller ID. I will have to be "away from my desk" at that moment.

I am kind of jealous that people I know are going away for the weekend. I missed an opportunity to go camping last weekend. I could use an escape. Vegas is just over a month away. One long month.

Not too shabby

I was content with my bowling yesterday. Just two games, 154, 156. About average for me. Enough to impress the non-bowling bosses.

I am happy that they did embrace what I consider the fundamentals of bowling. Beer. We had our own little army of empty bottles piling up on a table. To me, bowling is as much a part of having fun and drinking as it is rolling a good game.

Instant drinking advice:

Never drink tap beer at a bowling alley. I don't recall ever having a good
draft at a bowling alley. Ever. That has to be the one place where
the thought of cleaning the beer lines never comes to mind. Stick to
bottles while at the lanes.

I am proud to say that as of the time of this writing, I have no clue who won the student talent show that was the TELEVISION EVENT OF THE SEASON THAT HAD AMERICA SITTING BY THEIR TVS. Yes, I refuse to even type the name of the show anymore. I don't' care. Even when the hens are in here cackling about it in an hour, I still won't care. I am looking forward to seeing the last episode of Lost.

I am also thinking about changing my cell service. Currently I use Cingular. I have a good deal but the reception at my house is terrible. I am thinking of switching to Verizon. Any comments on whether Verizon is good or not?

It is a long weekend ahead. It really hasn't sunk in yet that it is a holiday weekend. I guess I have been too busy at work lately to know what is going on. Maybe I will have to sort plans out over 16 ounce beers tonight. Who is with me?

Words of advice for men

Guys, I relay some advice that I suggest you heed.

If you need to use the restroom because of the gallon of water you have been drinking, go directly to the urinal at once. Do not stop along the way. No matter how tempting the sticky rice krispy treat may be, fight the urge to grab one along the way. You will not realize how sticky the treat is until you unzip and pull out. Now you are stuck with a sticky penis. Being a workplace restroom, it is not like you can just throw your junk into the sink and wash it off. Thus you are stuck with sticky dick all day.

If only you could find the cute trampy chick in the office to help you out. But they fire you for things like that nowadays.

Bang your head

First thing I see in my email today is information about the bowling event tonight. People from California who have never bowled are setting this up. Thus I should not have been surprised to read about bowling only one game. WTF? No one bowls just one game unless you are on frickin' television and may win the dinner bucket or the picket fence prize!*

*Ok, only locals who remember the local smash hit TV show The Bowling Game will know what that means. Sorry peeps.

I got home from work later than usual last night. I passed on working out in favor of laying on the couch getting my metal on. Caught the second half of Behind the Music featuring Pantera. Man, was their lead singer messed up. Even in the interviews for the show, you can tell he just doesn't get it. His brain is fried. Still tragic what happened to Dimebag Darrel. I still remember hearing about his death on the radio the next day. Not because he died but people actually expected this shitty radio station (now the Hog) to play all Pantera songs from A to Z (schlocky gimmick they like to do). They never played Pantera to begin with so why the heck would they now? In the end, they put Walk on and that was it.

Next was Supergroup, the musical version of the Real World. What do you get when you put 5 metal musicians in a gay looking house and force them to make an album and play a concert within 12 days? Chaos! Or so they would like you to think. Interesting group though. Ted Nugent has the strongest personality and maybe the most respect of the group in the beginning. Scott Ian of Anthrax. Sebastian Bach of Skid Row. Jason Bonham of...Foreigner? Yes, he is playing with Foreigner now. And Evan Seinfeld of Biohazard. A rather eclectic group.

I thought the funniest thing of the first episode had to be the house. It was butt ugly. Garish. Totally gay! It must have been Liberace's old mansion in Vegas. Ian and Nugent would just amazed by how gay the place was.

The show could be interesting as they hint there will be a fight and Seinfeld will leave before it is over. Hell, the guy is married to porn star Tera Patrick (sorry, no link as I am doing this from work, otherwise hell yeah I would show you her tits!) and produces her movies, I would be leaving to go back to that as well. Of all the people, I would say he is the one that doesn't belong in the group anyways.

After that was over, Heavy: The history of Metal was on. Good stuff. This episode focused mainly on the Brits and the early days with Judas Priest. Later they moved on to Iron Maiden and Van Halen. Tons of interviews with former axemen, lead singers, DJs, magazine people and even VJs to go along with the music.

After 20 minutes I had to search out the rest of the episodes and DVR them. If only for the interviews. I think it may be a known fact of life. Rock stars do not age well. Here is the top 5 list of the rock stars or wannabes shown that look like hell warmed over. Sorry I have no time to search for photos.

5. Eddie Van Halen- ok, they didn't interview him on the show but have you seen him lately?
4. Nina Blackwood- yeah, she was a VJ, not a rock star but she looked like she was ridden hard and put away wet way too many times in her life.
3. Dee Snider- Not the prettiest boy in the group to begin with but he gets uglier with age. Hurts to say that cuz House of Hair is worth listening to and Snider still rocks.
2. Stephen Pearcy of Ratt. Now I know where my old catchers mitt is. Pearcy is using it for his face.
1. Jani Lane of Warrant- He must still be on drugs. He looks nothing like he did when he was in Warrant. His hair was stringy, looking like he lost patches of it. He looked sweaty and talked like he had just sandpapered his throat.

One final thing before I get to work. The promos for American Idol are killing me. America sits around their TV tonight waiting to hear who is crowned the next American Idol. It's the biggest television even of the season! Yeah, right. Eat my shorts. Only the braindead watch this show and care enough to believe and buy the music. Just another case of the recording industry trying to make you music decisions for you. Do yourself a favor. Go find some music that is truly fresh and original and listen to that, not some manufactured crud.

Knocking down pins

"For a note from your doctor saying you don't like to suck cock?!" - Tony
Soprano

That line cracked me up Sunday night. I thought Sunday's show was pretty good. There were some hilarious lines, scenes, and whackings. Except for the rag that Carmella went to France with, I thought it was one of the better nights this season. The Sopranos is just about done for the year now. Only one more episode before hiatus again. Then we have to wait probably 8 years to see how it all wraps up.

Boss is in town this week. Someone is setting up a bowling outing for her. Don't ask. I have no clue why. But that means I have to be on my best behavior and go out drinking with her. The things I do for my career.

Is it me or do there seem to be too many protests going on over the silliest things? Have we gone protest crazy in this country? Condoleeza Rice speaks at Boston College and everyone gets their undies in a bunch. The NRA holds a convention in Milwaukee and people are out with their signs. Everywhere President Bush goes, someone feels the need to organize a bunch of people to make a scene. Now, we have the right to free speech in this country so I am not against people protesting. But they are protesting over little things way too often. So Rice speaks to a graduating class. Is that a reason to quit your job there? If you don't like someone, isn't it more effective to not show up? If no one shows, that gets a message across. Making a bunch of signs and chanting slogans that rhyme just show you are nuts. Why can't these people focus their energy on a better cause that might help people?

I see no one still likes the Dixie Chicks. They want to blame it on comments they made about the President and the war, but could it just possibly be that the music sucks?

cuz baby I'm not...F.F.F.Foolin

The new Def Leppard disc comes out tomorrow. I was listening to it on Vh1 yesterday. Ugh! That is some awful music. Sounds nothing like Def Leppard. More like David Bowie meets ELO. Sadly, this is what they were aiming for. Pyromania? Only if you buy this disc and burn it in disgust. In fact, if the Leppard came to town, I would probably pass on seeing them. I wouldn't want to listen to four songs off this crappy albums.

Amazingly, the people of New Orleans re-elected their crappy mayor. WTF? He does one crap ass job of evacuating a city and gets rewarded with another term? I found it interesting how people were encouraged to drive in to vote or how they provided buses to bring them back. Um..if they are not living there now, and are driving back to Houston or Atlanta after placing their vote, why are they allowed to vote? They are not residents of the city. Should those who are living in N.O. be forced to live with the bad decision made by others who aren't even there?

Why does it seem that the local TV reporters always find the dumbest people to interview for some stories? Yesterday, I hear a story on the news that the Racine County Zoo is going to start charging people for admission. They can no longer offer a free zoo because of costs. So of course they interview one adult and one child. Yeah, the 6 year old kid know what the hell is going on. The adult says they are disappointed they will have to pay and may not come. The child says "I don't think they should change". That is some fantastic reporting. Of course if something is free, people will balk if they suddenly have to pay for it.

I found this article interesting. Though I have no clue what the fuck they are talking about. If these bitches want to fuck with me, well, I will kick the shit out of them. Dumb fuckstick bastard douchebags!

Speaking of fuckstick bastard douchebags, some of you may be familiar with the story of one Bobby Bracelet. He has been shut down by the douchebags for which he works. Apparently they did not like his sense of humor. Ignorantly enough, they forces him to stop when he was working hard to help someone else. Bob has been one of the driving forcec behind For Peyton. How does some douchebag not see that?

So in honor of Bob, I think you should try to work one of his favorites words into your conversation today- douchebag. Call you co-worker a douchebag day! Of course, other forms of the word- douchebagging, douchebaggerry, douchebaggedly, douchebaggingly, douchebagged, or any other you care to create- can be used as well.

and you really care

I didn't make it out to Hart Fest on Friday. I headed up to Big Mommas to escape the inevitable. The thoughts of what would go on Saturday were weighing heavy on my mind. I was willing to sit there, watch baseball, and sort things out 32 ounces at a time.

It was one of those interesting nights. Apparently there are a group of guys who come in every Friday right after work. You know the kind. The young, dumb, and full of cum crowd. They all wear the same type of clothes (the metrosexual look), are boisterous, shake dice, constantly make phone calls, and pound pussy shots. In this case, it is Jager bombs. They try to keep the attention of the bartenders just to show they aren't gay. All the while bragging about money or how many shots they did. They can be entertaining to a point but are usually annoying.

I sat down and talked with the old man Pat. Next to him were some low life looking types and one really drunk chick. I thought the drunk chick was with the guys. She was talking with them and it appeared they were buying her drinks. Next thing I know old man Pat is leaning in and talking to her. She utters a line that had me and the bartender cracking up. Ladies, you may want to try this one out. Pat asked her something, she responds and then says "You do know I am deaf?" Pat's hearing is worse than hers and he keeps going in. I think they were even making out at one point. Though he is old, he still got game apparently.

There is another group of guys who have become regulars at Big Mommas. Shifty looking guys. They are the smooth talkers who think that all the women want them. And one of them just doesn't shut up. He will pound his Kettle concoction. The other one drinks- get this- taps of Bud Light with ice. WTF? You might as well drink water. Why are you even in a bar? If I was the bartender, I wouldn't serve him. I would tell him to leave. Anyone who is order colored water and then adds ice should just stick to kiddie cocktails. They are stronger.

After shooting the shit with Dave and getting my fill, I came home to play some drunken poker before hitting the sack. Saturdy was going to be a long day. We got quite a bit down but there is much more to do. I didn't realize I would be crawling around an attic for an hour. This is suddenly a summer project. Many more Saturdays will need to be devoted to this task. It sucks to put so much time in and realize you have only made a dent.

Things could be worse. I was sad to see that the Rolling Rock brand was sold to Anheuser Busch. Great, now AB is going to mess with another beer. The poor people of Latrobe, PA are losing their brewery as AB has already decided to make the Rock elsewhere. Rolling Rock is a good beer. They better not mess with the recipe.

If you're really there

You cannot beat good drink, good friends, and a good meal. A triumvirate to beat all.

The Leinie Sunset Wheats were going down well yesterday. Right after work it started by saying goodbye to a co-worker. Then it was moved downtown for some good Italian food as we celebrated Cor's birthday.

I had a good night. Don't feel too bad this morning either.

Which is good since my email is screwed up. Nothing worse than finding out the distribution lists you have been creating and maintaining for the last year were replaced with an archived copy-unbeknownst to me (yeah, I wanted to say unbeknownst)- after I had sent a company wide email yesterday. Now I will have to fill in the gaps, resend it to people who may have not received it, and feel the wrath of my boss. It will be total bullshit. I had worked hard to combine 4 lists into 2 and now it the work was gone. Maybe I don't tell her...

The Brewers cooled off the hot Phillies. SWEEP. It wasn't the prettiest way. They basically sputtered for 5 innings, then busted loose for one and held on to win by a run. Same formula for every game. Now they need to continue it against a weaker Twinkies team. I will have to hit one of these games this weekend, most likely Sunday.

Yeah, if I found out a former porn star was now working here I would only check it out if it was a chick. I would have fellow female co-workers or friends to check any guys out. As Erik points out, when guys see watch any action-adventure movies, we don't care about the dude in there. Thing is, if it was a guy, you would pretty much have to become his friend. It would be a sure fire hookup. You know he would still have connections and go to wild parties. So you would have to get in good to get in good. Unless he was in gay porn. Then you really need to be careful.

I am disheartened that I won't be joining the gang at the campgrounds this weekend. Lots of work tomorrow. Things should go smoothly. I may have to get in a dial-a-shot with the by the campfire. It would be the closest thing to being there.

I may make up for it by hitting up Hart Fest. It is the first festival of the season. May be cool but the beer is still drinkable. The music may not be the best (local band the Toys are playing- can you say overrated?) but it should be a good time still. Kind of like training camp for the real events later in the summer.

Oh, I just gotta know

First I must squelch rumors. No, this isn't my house. Hmm.."an estimated 70,000 cans: 24 beers a day for 8 years. " 24 beer in 24 hours for 8 years....

Let me put out a hypothetical situation. Say there is a new employee at your workplace. You look at her/him and feel like you know or have seen them somewhere before. But you can't quite put your finger on it.

Then it hits you. You know where you have seen them before. A friend comes up and confirms your conclusions. They are a former porn star!

So, do you go on the net to see pictures of her/him?

Anybody care?

It was a bountiful bucket night yesterday. I guess people were sick of the rain and when the storm finally let up, drinking beer was what all the cool kids had to do. Even the resident bingologist showed up. We didn't solve the world's problems but came close.

Text messages were the thing last night. Eva started it by talking shit on my Brewers. I would have the last laugh as they would go on to win, but not after making it closer than it should have been.

I think it was during the sex talk (when is the best time? Morning apparently for the ladies I was with) that the Blonde called. But it wasn't the Blonde. It was Al. He and Big Mike had hooked up with her at a strip club and were calling to do a dial-a-shot. I could hardly hear him with the music blaring in the bar on my end and high class stripper music on his end. I fought my way up to get a shot and the dial-a-shot was completed.

I think we got onto sex because a friend of mine had mentioned he had never had make up sex. Claims he has never fought with any of his girlfriends. I was shocked. Everyone has disagreements. I guess he just doesn't let it escalate. I encouraged him to start something so he could have make up sex before they broke up. Hey, some things you gotta do.

I did learn something last night. If you text message someone lyrics to the song that is playing on the jukebox, it may confuse the hell out of them. Especially if it is Deep Purple. So think before sending "We must remain Perfect Strangers". It may save you a hassle.

I ran across this story yesterday and it kinda bothered me. Kids chasing sports cars is not as weird as fencing? It was bad enough that it was a lame ass story about kids who tape cars, but the names of two kids really ticked me off. Who the hell names their kids Spyder and Dash? Seriously. The parents deserve an ass kicking for doing that. Then the kids. I wish I had a kid that was 14 years old. I would take him to California just to kick this kid's ass because his name is Spyder. There is also the comment the dad makes saying that they could be doing something weird, like say...fencing? WTF?


I believe more beer is on top for tonight. After work is a going away party, followed by a birthday dinner, and then probably big mouths. Or little mouths. It doesn't really care as long as the beer is cold.

Does anybody wonder?

Random thoughts from yesterday:

Why is there a ton of food in here today? Good thing I brought my nuts.

Cheese and crackers make for a good mid morning snack. I wish I could catch a buzz off the Port Wine Cheddar spread.

Just saw a termination for a guy who was stricken with cancer. First reaction was the worst thought. Hope I am wrong.

I think I may get sick from some of the phrases I have heard from the women today. "That is a cute sneeze, tee hee hee".

I hate it when people start talking to me without either having my attention or addressing me by name, especially when I am busy. This has happened 3 times already. I am reading a document and my assistant starts talking. I am focused on what I am reading. I hear her as noise in the background. She then gets into a hissy fit because I am not responding. I turned and asked if she was talking to me. After I get the look, I answer her question. You think she would have learned, but NOOOOOOOOO. An hour later she is sticking a folder in my face, expecting me to drop everything I am doing and sign off on some papers. I took the folder and set it aside. After she sighed and sat down all grumpy, I finished what I was doing and then reviewed what I had to sign. Next time, I purposely will ignore her longer.

It is quite disappointing that Bobby Bracelet has been shut down. Scary to an extent. I guess it is possible that could happen to me as well. Bobby, any time you care to vent, you have space available here. Afterall, the 860th greatest poker player (as of 6/30/05) should have presence on the interwebby thing.

Just noticed a headline on the front page of the Wall Street Journal. A Problem for Hot Web Outfits: Keeping Pages Free From Porn. Must stop and read the article. Part of my job is keeping up to date on what is going on in the world.

While reading about porn (only because I have to read for my job, I get nothing else out of it), I started laughing. I watched the latest episode of Big Love last night. The oldest kid just about lost his girlfriend (cute chick) because he didn't want to put out. So he decides to do her to save the relationship. How Seinfeldian. Sex to save the relationship. Anyways, he gets in and give 3 thrusts and is done. No wonder he didn't want to give in. He had no game.

Whoooooo are you? Who, who, who, who.

The black beans and corn salad was quite good at lunch. Would have been better if not served cold, IMO. The chicken cordon bleu was just ok.

Why does everyone forget the illegal part when discussing illegal immigration? They claim illegal immigrants are not criminals but....they are illegal. Thus, they are criminals. American policies are not against immigration. Just illegal immigration. Some people need to get that part straight.
So now that I have headphones on to block out the annoyance of the interruptions, do you think that would stop some people? Of course not.

I just snapped. She kept waving a paper in front of me, insisting I pay attention. She even whisted to get my attention. I asked in a stern manner why she was bothering me. It was to tell me something she found funny about someone's name. Please, let me shoot her.

Maker's and ginger would be really good right now. I often wonder if I could hide a bottle or flask with me at work. Some day I may gamble. Nah, not really.

My brain checks out of work at 3. The rest of me physically leaves around 4. I think I need to start sending up meetings at 3. You can always find me in conference room T. That is the code word for the bar across the street.

I got home and heard the other lawn mowers running in the neighborhood. I felt the grass as I walked up to the house. Barely damp. The warm sun was doing its best to dry out the turf. Damn peer pressure. I didn't want to be the guy with the tall grass on the corner so I mowed the lawn.

As I mowed I couldn't help but notice the dandelions lay there dead, looking like snakes. No, not on a plane! I ran them over a couple times just to be sure.

I think that all work and no play will make me a dull guy. So the Maker's is being poured tonight. Very low on ginger. Will be going neat soon.

While watching the Brewers/Phillies game, I couldn't help but try to guess the Blonde's FwB. I think it is the catcher. I also had to use the DVR to see the Miller Lite Man Law commercial. I am usually in a bar seeing these and haven't heard any of the dialog yet. No, you cannot bring beer to a party and take it home with you.

Man, that sucks seeing them carry J J Hardy into the dugout. Great throw to the plate by Burrell. J J slides but runs into a wall. Ugly. Hope it ain't too serious of an injury.

Brewers win!

Why must people get their undies in a bunch because of the Da Vinci Code? It is a movie! I enjoyed the book years ago, but I didn't think it was the gospel truth. Don't take everything so seriously.

I don't know if I could live as a duck. I don't think I would like having my ass in water most of the day.

Anybody there?

I woke up this morning wondering what I would have to do today. I first thought was there wasn't much at work to get done. So I laid in bed and relaxed a bit before getting up. The cat had other thoughts though.

He has been having some strange eating cycles lately. Some days he eats all the food. Others maybe half. When he does pig out he gets cranky for more in the morning. This was one of those mornings. He kept whining. Over and over. I have a simple solution for this.

I throw socks at him. I have some old socks that are balled up that I launch at him. Of course it is dark and I have no clue how close I may be getting until I hear a cat-like "oomph" when he takes it in the puss.

Hey, I could throw beer bottles...

Once I got to work, I noticed a number of emails with attachments. Great. I suddenly went from wondering what had to be done to will I get everything done. I have a fun filled day ahead.

Now, this cannot be just me that thinks this, but should my congresswoman intentionally try to be arrested? I understand the purpose here and think it is a good cause. But how does that serve the people of Milwaukee or Wisconsin? The slaughter in Sudan is terrible, but is this her place to act? I don't think so.

Meanwhile the Governor of Wisconsin has no interest in national security. If asked, he plans to fight sending Wisconsin National Guard troops to help in securing borders. I find it interesting how "he was unsure whether the nation's chief executive has that authority". Um...shouldn't you find this out before you make such a statement? He doesn't know if Wisconsin can spare any troops. When was the last time the Wisconsin National Guard was called to duty in the state of Wisconsin? Governor Doofus needs to stop the posturing. I also think he is trying to find a way to get some casino to give him some money before he can commit any troops.

So who tried the Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat this past weekend? Hands? Did you like it? Good stuff. I don't know if I saw this correctly but the local grocery store may have cases of Leinenkugel cans on sale for just $11. Nothing wrong with a cold Leinie's original to quench your thirst.

Especially when you brought your nuts in to work. I bought a big jar of peanuts for people to enjoy. Main reason was the guy in the pod in front of me had a huge jar in here last week and I partook in the snack. So when he comes in and asks who brought in the peanuts, do I tell him "Yeah, I was grabbing your nuts last week and decided I should bring some in as well".

Uh, no. That doesn't sound good. Think I will stick to a simple "I did".

Is anybody out there?

As I walked out the house this morning, I stared at the swamp jungle my lawn was becoming. With all the rain we have had over the last week, it has grown pretty high. The ground is soggy. With rain expected for another 3 days minimum, I won't be cutting until Friday at the earliest. I refuse to cut wet grass. Mucks up the mower and rips the grass out of the soft ground.

But it needs to be done soon.

For once I actually watched a full season of Survivor again. I had skipped the last couple seasons before DVRing it this time around. No shocker that Danielle screwed Terry. She is too stupid to realize that was her only chance. No way would she defeat Aras. She could have appealed to her former tribe mates to vote for her instead of the opposing tribe. In the end she got what she deserved.

Brew Crew come through yesterday with a nice victory. I find the whole pink bat issue amusing. So MLB wanted to raise awareness for breast cancer. Raise awareness. Like breast cancer is unknown to society as a whole? I am fully aware of breasts where ever I go. I like healthy breasts. I feel the need to nurture and massage them to health whenever I can. I think I have healing hands that can help prevent cancer. So why doesn't MLB sponsor me? I got their pink bat right here...

That is about all I got now. I still think those pancakes are killing me.

Maybe I shouldn't have ate it

Question....what is the shelf life of pankcake mix?

I stared at the pancake mix in the pantry shelf a week ago. All I could think was the most obvious thought. Mmm...tasty pancakes! So I picked up some syrup and waited for the weekend to arrive so I could enjoy my tasty pancakes.

Boy, what a mistake. I actually had two boxes of mix. One had just over half a cup left. The other was much fuller. I made it according to the directions. I couldn't wait to feast on the "light and fluffy" pancakes promised by Mrs. Butterworth.

Man, what a lying bitch she is. Heavy and hard was more like it. I wouldn't have eaten them if I wasn't so looking forward to this.

Maybe I should throw the other box out.

Cheap night

I should be focusing on the poker game. The rebuy portion is over but most players still are in idiot mode. It is the dangerous spot of the tournament. That is why I should focus.

Kind of like last night. I had focus. On the boobs. Oh, the Brewers game too.

It was a boobalicious night. Each of the bartenders ignored the fact that is was cold and rainy outside. I had a seat right by the washer and a bottle opener. If you cannot be by the ice tub, this is the next best thing. Hey, I am not afraid to admit it. I look. Don't care where I am, work, food store, restaurant. If the ladies want to show the goods, the least I can do is look. I do it for them. Helps their self esteem.

DJW didn't seem to mind. He was grinning ear to ear when he realized the view was good.

I just about passed on heading out to Big Mommas. The weather was sucky, I was tired, and I didn't feel like grabbing something warm to wear. But I did want to watch the baseball game and watching at home is not a real option. I knew that if I got up and out, a beer would make the difference and I would feel better

The Brewers didn't play that well last night but got a victory. Pitching was not good and the offense was non-existent until Prince Fielder hit that bomb. Jenkins gets a clutch double and the momentum swings heavily for the Crew to pick up the victory.

I had 5 of the 32 ounce beers last night. They cost $3 a pop. Guess how much I spent last night? C'mon guess. $6. Really. Only six of my hard earned dollars went into the register. Bartender gets a nice tip to boot and I am happy. I even "bought" a round. About the only thing that didn't go for me was the shake of the day.

Ok, back to the poker game. Just doubled up to put myself into a great position. Must focus now.

Why am I here?

There are a lot of thoughts going on in my head right now. First one is why am I here. I could have dialed it in. I could be at home sleeping. Instead I am at work where I know I won't do all that much.

But I will get paid.

Ah, that is why I am here.

My brain feels like it is floating in beer. I gave it a good 6 hours of swim time yesterday. Right after work I headed across the street to enjoy some nice Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat. Great. Fuckin. Beer. If you like Blue Moon, try the Leinie's Sunset Wheat. It just may be the best beer they have ever made.

It was with the work people that I pissed some people off. They are all excited about Pearl Jam playing Summerfest. I yawned and simply said they are a bunch of overrated whiners and that the 90s was the worst decade of music ever. That is me. Making friends where ever I go.

After giving it a couple hours at the workplace watering hole, I headed out to Big Mommas to meet up with Gambino. Glad I did because Erik was at the bar as well. We had been talking about having him come down to Big Mommas to meet up with some of the local blogging elite *cough cough* such as I, Gambino, and Dave. I tried to get Dave on the line but he wasn't answering or he was face down on the kitchen floor after drinking Kesslers.

When I got to the bar, H comes up to me and says there is a guy at the end of the bar asking about someone who drinks Makers Mark. Maybe that is how I should be known from now on. The guy who drinks Maker's Mark. I like that. Except when I try to drink it too fast and it goes down the wrong pipe. Did that last night. Just a tad embarassing.

Where was I? Oh yeah, so Gambino, Erik and I sat around shooting the shit comparing bars. We shall be heading out to his local establishment next week to check it out. It is a comarison of who dive bar is more....divey? Should be good. I am glad he came out.

I took off early from the bar. Still haven't figured out exactly why I am at work right now. Could have slept in and no one would have known the difference.

But in 8 hours I will be out. I will probably be up drinking more beer later. Maybe this time I will eat something. Broke that rule last night. Must remember to eat when drinking for 6 hours. The corn beef, mayo and saurkraut sandwich wasn't bad though.

I do know that my tolerance for stupidity is on the low side today. I gave my co-worker the blank look when she asked why I hadn't taken the day off to go fishing. It is cold and rainy. You are not funny. At least that is the look that I was trying to give. Then I listen to my voicemail and my boss perhaps asked the stupidest question. No, it wasn't "Do you like beer?". I was close with "Do you have plans for Summerfest?"

I think I need to find some donuts.

Bassetball Jones

As my afternoon spiraled down like crap in a flushing toilet, I knew that I would be taking up Gambino and her offer for buckets of beer. The only good thing that occurred was me being able to leave before my boss called yet again.

Before leaving my workplace, I stopped by a friend's desk to ask what time he was playing volleyball. Earlier, I ran into him at lunch and he had asked if I was going to be up at the bar to watch them play. I told him I was going out for buckets and I would probably see him. On my way out I asked what time they were playing. He told me 9 and then asked what time I was playing basketball. Of course he did the universal white man sign for basketball and acted like he was taking a shot.

Basketball?

He noticed the confused look on my face and said "You said you were going out for buckets. You are not playing basketball?"

I looked at him and began laughing. "No, buckets of beer. I hate basketball." The guys behind him were rolling. I had a hard time standing up. Never have I heard anyone mistake buckets of beer for playing basketball.

So I went to the bar right after changing clothes. The buckets started flowing. It sucked that the Brewers were on the west coast so the game wasn't on til late. Of course, ESPN feels the need to shove yet another Yankees/Red Sox game down our throat. Will ESPN ever realize that only people on the east coast care about either of these teams? Once you get past the Appalachians, we don't give a fuck about the Yanks or the Bosox! Learn that no one cares about those teams and stop forcing us to watch it.

I ended up watching Deal or No Deal without sound. I think the show is better without volume. Just my opinion but it is a show for people that have been dropped on their heads. No real thinking involved. Plus, to be a contestant, you just need to be able to 1) be willing to make a fool out of yourself, and 2) have a friend or family member who will make a fool out of themselves. Case in point. Some white guy who apparently loves music because a marching band showed up- I am guessing he is the band teacher- was running all over the stage and trying to entertain. Even did the white boy version of James Brown. Please, don't do that again. But worse was his fat brother/friend on the side with what looked to be his parents. When the guy picked a low numbered case, fat boy was hunched over dancing, shaking his ass. Thanks a lot Mr. Producer. I didn't need to see that.

After DoND, the Dateline predator show was on. I wish there was volume for this one. We enjoyed watching the scumballs get taken down one after another. But what was with the guy who brought his kid along? He got out of the car with what appeared to be a 3 or 4 year old boy. WTF? Though some in the bar thought it was sad this happened to the kid, I didn't feel sorry for him at all. If his father is that big of a loser, he deserves to lose custody of the child. The child can only end up in a much better place.

More drinking shall ensue later today. I think it is the last day for some people at work so afterwork drinks are in order. Maybe followed by some big mouths at Big Mommas. Who's with me?

My barber, the cockblocker?

I was a bit stunned when it happened. Did my barber just cockblock me?

I saw her out of the corner of my eye. Petite girl coming out of the back room, by the tanning beds. I turned my head to get a better look. As I did, he turned the chair so I couldn't see her. Then he put the clipper right by my ear, giving me a good buzz.

But I caught her again in the mirror. I noticed a nice ass being hidden under the powder blue running pants. Natural instinct had my head turning again. And I'll be damned if he didn't turn that damn chair once again. I realized I had been cockblocked by the barber!

The barber has been cutting my hair for about 10 years now. Does a fine job. He added 3 or 4 tanning beds to his shop back in the 90s to boost income. Every once in a while you can find a cute chick in there. Most of the time it is old buzzards trying to look young.

Thus I was a bit stunned, then upset, that he blocked me from getting an eyeful. Maybe this is his bit of turf that he is willing to defend to the end. The barber must be in his 50s and I guess he gets his jollies off some young women laying naked in his tanning beds.

Good to see the Brewers snap the mini-losing streak last night. Funny stat fact from last night.
Jeff Cirillo hit his first home run of the year. All of the active position players for the Crew have gone yard this year. Not sure if they are the only team for this to happen but it is interesting.

But not as interesting as how the Philadelphia fans treated Barry Bonds this past weekend. Brutal. I did love the sign that read "Babe Ruth did it on hot dogs and beer. Hank Aaron did with class. How did you do it?" Did I say sign? It was a huge banner. The pic was on CNNSI yesterday but I can't find it today. In fact, read the article. I must give credit to Phillies fans. They were original.

In doing the spellcheck, I noticed I had 3 variations of saying "cockblocked". I wonder how many Google searches will lead people here now...

Updated at 2:35
Thanks to Gambino for finding the picture:

Insert evil laugh here

I looked at the grass yesterday evening and was happy. The dandelions were falling over, the creeping charlie was shriveling up, the pricker weeds were wilting. With a sneer, I let out an audible evil laugh.

I have won round 1. The weed and feed worked well once again.

But my laughter would soon die when I realized the "feed" portion had truly kicked in and I would have to mow the lawn soon. The next audible is not appropriate for children. Add some rain and I will be mowing the lawn a lot.

Mowing the lawn a lot. Is it only me but does that sound kinda dirty. What is he doing? Mowing the lawn. Yeah baby, a lot!

More acts for Summerfest are being announced. Nothing of great interest to me quite yet. I do find the Candlebox show slated for July 4 to pique my curiosity. I remember seeing them during their breakout year (year escapes me) when some friends from Michigan came to town. The Rock Stage was absolutely packed. You couldn't move. It was a good show too. Two years later they would basically be gone after the second album failed. Funny how the music business can be.

I see the band In Flames will be coming to town in August. Now I need to get my metal music loving friend to go to the show. GWAR is slated to be there too. That is just fun to say. GWARRRRRRRR!

I think the car across from me at the gas station drove off without paying this morning. I couldn't help but notice his car was still running when he was fueling. I looked at his pump and noticed there wasn't a 'prepay' notice on his like there was on mine. I kept an eye on him as he pulled the nozzle out of the tank, put the cap back on, but did not put the license plate back up (yeah, how old is that car that the gas tank is hidden by the license plate?) and non-chalantly jumped into his car and drove away. I tried to notice if the machine had the thank you notice up showing but it was a tad far to see. Maybe he did pay for it. Afterall, gas was only $2.80 this morning.

Maybe I shouldn't be sarcatic about gas prices. Afterall, we are still at war. A war we have been, and still are winning. Though the major media will never tell you that. Power Line has some interesting reading up from the enemy. Yet, some people will say it is a disaster over there. Continue to say prayers for the brave men and women defending our country. The are doing a fantastic job and hopefully will be home soon.

Flux

I got home around 1:30 am Saturday morning. I had an interesting night at the party. I drank enough beer and shots to keep me happy which was a good thing. My friend's ex-boss was annoying the living f*ck out of me and I was ready to pop him in the nose. All about something totally trivial. Being a caddy.

There wasn't much planned for the weekend besides getting the lawn cut at my mother's house. I loathe doing the first cut of the year. That is when you find all the problems with the house and yard. My mother is in her 60s now and doesn't do any kind of upkeep on the house. That falls to me and my siblings- no that all falls to me. I can get most repairs made but not all. This time around it would be worse than before.

After walking around picking up dead branches in the backyard, unclogging a drain pipe that had a foot of soil in it and picking up corn cobs (I still have no clue why there was a half dozen corn cobs in the backyard), I noticed the water spout on the house leaking. Not dripping, but running a bit. With my plumbing experiences lately, you would think I would know better than to try and tackle this one. By the time, I was done "fixing" it, it was running at a good clip. The only solution was to close the shutoff valve inside the house- something that already have been done years ago. And my key to the house is with my car keys, not the truck keys.

I band on the door a couple of times. My mom is most likely with my sister and the kids. I call there and leave a message. I finish cutting the grass and pack up to leave. I can't help but look at the house and think of all the work it needs. Paint. Minor roof repair. New garage door. I realize my mother cannot afford the house any more. I believe the mortgage is paid but she has no income. Beside the car it is likely her only asset. And it is slowly falling apart.

I pull away and decide I need a beer. A beer would take care of the headache I still have from the prior night and allow me to relax a bit. I drive across town and stop at Big Mommas. There are actually a half dozen people inside the place around 1. I grab a stool and start shooting the shit with Kevin the bartender.

My sister then calls back. I speak with her for a while about what is going on. She then gives me more information. I then speak with my mother and get some serious news. It wasn't a shocker. I think I have basically been trying to ignore it. After speaking with my sister and later, my brother, we all realize that we can't act like everything is good. I insist we get together soon to take care of things. In two weeks we need to figure out how to take care of my mother. We need to get finances in shape, her health and living arrangements. Part of it may be fixing up the house so it can be sold. I now have to convince my sister that she needs to have her move in so she can take care of the kids and tell my mother that she needs to sell her house. I don't know if I can do that. It feels cruel.

I was in the bar for about 5 hours. Did a couple of dial-a-shots to get my mind off my issues. Instead of becoming a total booze sponge I left while I could still drive. Alcohol can help eleviate the issues at first but it is not a long term solution. Especially at a bar where you can potentially make a fool out of yourself or get an ass kicking. I looked at the bottle of Maker's Mark when I got home. It was inviting, but I opted not to. Instead I sat down to think. Life is always going to put obstacles in the way. Some are good, some bad. But nothing one cannot get over. I have an obstacle to tackle. Won't be easy.

In a strange way, I am glad to be at work today. Two days after talking with family I have a much clearer picture of the situation. It is also a nice diversion. For once, I will get a lot of work done today. Then, I will be prepared for the other work that needs to get done.

How drunk was I to blog in Spanish?

Yeah, so you aren't buying that.

I came across this idea a couple of weeks ago. I was going through StatCounter checking out how people end up getting here. I noticed a spanish search that brought someone to this site. I clicked on through and saw my blog- in Spanish. I thought that was interesting, especially the title, Mientras que bebe, I... I figured it would be funny to put up a post in Spanish for Cinco de Mayo just to be different. And make people go WTF???

Playing with a translator, I typed up a post and popped it through. I then posted the results. Of course, I had to play a bit more so I took the Spanish translation and put in back in as Spanish to English. I don't claim for this to be an original idea. BG used to do this on Oddjack. So I decided to give you the original post and the translation after it goes from English to Spanish to English.

I know of one person who thought I was fluent in Spanish and that I had typed that up. I think she was the only one who was hip enough (subtle hint) to use a translator to see what I had typed. I guess she has a lot of time on her hands. So here is what yesterday's post said followed by the translation back from Spanish to English.

Different.

That is the only way I can really explain how things felt last night. I had finished beating the crap out of the weed and feed attachment on the hose. It wouldn’t come off so I was beating it on the ground. It was at the moment that I decided to grill some burgers and head out to the bar.

Ever notice that when you grill burgers just right, you cannot eat just one? I had made about 4 ¼ pound burgers and tossed them on the grill. As they cooked, I was giving Cor some more advice about stocking up the bar for his party. The focus was on bottles of liquor. He was pretty much set but needed more tequila only because he had bought the pre-made Cuervo margarita mix with the tequila already in it. I had to explain to him that everyone adds tequila to those things. They come extremely weak.

Things already had been different. I had actually sprayed weed and feed on the lawn. I spontaneously decided to grill burgers. What was next?

I headed up to the bar and was surprised not to see Gambino planted in front of the video slot machine. No Gambino? WTF? H was working behind the bar so at least there was some normalcy. I got me a Miller Lite and she put this weird bottle in front of me. They changed the bottle. No more big mouth. Ay Carumba!

Things would get even stranger. I call Mr. AlCantHang for a dial a shot and found him to be drinking Miller Lite as well. He was enjoying the Phillies game with the ballpark voyager, Brandon, and didn’t have his usual Southern Comfort with him. Strange. So a dial a beer was done instead.

I was beginning to be weirded out by all the different things going on. Seeing that the crappy karaoke guy was in the bar, I knew I had to get out soon. I called it an early night so I could get home and get the cell phone charged up. This morning I noticed I missed Mrs. EvaCanHang’s dial a shot.

I guess I have no alternative for tonight. I have a fully charged phone and a need to get drunk. Thank God it is the weekend.

There are some great lines here. I think my favorite is the "daisy of Crow".


Different
That one is the only way that I can really explain how the things felt yesterday at night. Beating of crap outside the accessory of the bad grass and the feeding in the hose had finished. It would not leave so it beat it in the Earth. It was at the moment that decided to roast to parilla to a little hamburgers and head towards it go to the bar.

Notice whenever that when you roast to parilla hamburgers as soon as she straightens, you you cannot eat one hardly? He had done near 4 hamburgers of the pound of ¼ and he had shaken them in the grill. Whereas they cooked, he gave to heart more advice on the storage upon the bar for his party. The center was in the bottles of licor. It was much fixed salary pretty but to have needed more tequila only because it had bought the mixture pre-done of the daisy of Crow with the tequila already in him. I had to explain him that each one adds tequila to those things. They come extremely weak.

The things had been already different. It had sprinkled really the bad grass and the feeding in the turf. It spontaneously decided to roast to parilla hamburgers. Which was following?

I directed until the bar and was surprised not to see Gambino planted in front of the groove machine video. No Gambino? WTF? H worked behind the bar was some so at least there normalcy. I obtained a Miller Lite and it put this strange bottle in front of me. They changed the bottle. Not more of great mouth. Ay Carumba!

The things would obtain to foreign uniform. I call to Senor AlCantHang for a dial a shot and I found it to also drink to Miller Lite. He enjoyed the game of Phillies with voyager of the baseball stage, Brandon, and he did not have his southern comfort generally with him. Stranger. A dial a beer was done so instead of another one.

It began to be weirded towards outside by all the different things that they ignited. Seeing that the individual crappy of karaoke was in the bar, it knew that I had to leave soon. I called one night early so caretaker could obtain and to obtain the telephone of the cell loaded for above.

This morning I noticed that the dial of Mrs. EvaCanHang needed a shot. I conjecture that I do not have any alternative for tonight. I completely have a telephone loaded and a necessity to obtain drunkard. Thank for God that is the weekend.

This post is brought to you by Cheap Trick. I own around 400 CDs. To kill some time and to make things interesting, I have begun to just walk up to the case and grab a random CD for play. Today it is Live From Budokan, the Complete Concert. The Complete Concert is much better than the original Budokan album. I highly recommend upgrading. Til then, Auf Wiedersehen.

And rock on with your bad self. Or as they like to say en espanol....
roca encendido con su mal uno mismo.

Mientras que bebe, I...

Diferente

Ésa es la única manera que puedo realmente explicar cómo las cosas sentían el ayer por la noche. Había acabado el batir del crap fuera del accesorio de la mala hierba y de la alimentación en la manguera. No saldría así que la batía en la tierra. Era en el momento que decidía asar a la parilla a un poco de hamburguesas y cabeza hacia fuera a la barra.

¿Note siempre que eso cuando usted asa a la parilla las hamburguesas apenas endereza, usted no puede comer apenas uno? Había hecho cerca de 4 hamburguesas de la libra del ¼ y las había sacudido en la parrilla. Mientras que cocinaron, daba a corazón más consejo sobre el almacenamiento encima de la barra para su partido. El foco estaba en las botellas de licor. Él era mucho haber fijado bonito pero haber necesitado más tequila solamente porque él había comprado la mezcla pre-hecha del margarita de Cuervo con el tequila ya en él. Tuve que explicar a él que cada uno agrega tequila a esas cosas. Vienen extremadamente débil.

Las cosas habían sido ya diferentes. Había rociado realmente la mala hierba y la alimentación en el césped. Decidía espontáneamente asar a la parilla las hamburguesas. ¿Cuál era siguiente?

I dirigido hasta la barra y fue sorprendido para no ver Gambino plantado delante de la máquina de ranura video. ¿Ningún Gambino? ¿WTF? H trabajaba detrás de la barra tan por lo menos allí era algún normalcy. Me conseguí un Miller Lite y ella puso esta botella extraña delante de mí. Cambiaron la botella. No más de boca grande. ¡Ay Carumba!

Las cosas conseguirían a extranjero uniforme. Llamo a Senor AlCantHang para un dial un tiro y lo encontré para beber a Miller Lite también. Él gozaba del juego de Phillies con el voyager del estadio de béisbol, Brandon, y no tenía su comodidad meridional generalmente con él. Extraño. Un dial una cerveza fue hecho tan en lugar de otro.

Comenzaba a ser weirded hacia fuera por todas las cosas diferentes que se encendían. Viendo que el individuo crappy del karaoke estaba en la barra, sabía que tuve que salir pronto. La llamé una noche temprana así que podría conseguir casero y conseguir el teléfono de la célula cargó para arriba. Esta mañana noté que falté el dial de señora EvaCanHang un tiro.

Conjeturo que no tengo ningún alternativa para esta noche. Tengo un teléfono completamente cargado y una necesidad de conseguir borracho. Agradezca a dios que es el fin de semana.

Happy Cinco de Mayo.

You having a party tomorrow?

If so, then I have some good advice for you. Same advice I dispensed to a friend on Tuesday for the party he is having on Friday for Cinco de Mayo.

I have a small issue with Cinco de Mayo. Actually 2 small issues. First, most people have no idea what this Mexican holiday is about. It is not independence. It is a military victory. A weak one at that because they defeated the French. Like that should be a reason to celebrate. Second, this is more of a drinking holiday heavily promoted by the liquor companies, mainly Corona and Cuervo.

Of course, the drinking part I have no issue with. I take issue with the bad booze part. Cuervo is owned by Diageo, a British conglomerate. What do they know about tequila? Marketing! Cuervo is bad tequila. It is mostly sugar, not agave. Thus, it tastes like crap. Who admits to liking Cuervo? Same with Corona. It is not good beer. Even Mexicans don't drink it. They prefer Tecate. Seems like Corona is drank mostly by college kids and pretentious assholes. I bet they have no clue why a lime is served with it.

Editors note (fancy way for covering my ass)- If you like Corona, that is fine. It is just my opinion. Enjoy your beer. If you are not a pretentious asshole, then you should not have any problem with my opinion. Hell, you shouldn't take anything I say here seriously. But if you want to talk about it over a beer, let's do so. I'll buy the Skull Splitter Ale for you.

So when my friend Cor called the other day about his party, he wanted to know of a place to get a good price for the beer he was buying. He was planning on getting Corona, Tecate, and Pacifico. I gave him a couple liquor stores that would be good as well as the local grocery store- hey you cannot argue their pricing power.

I then asked how much he was expecting to get. He told me about 5 or 6 cases. What? By his calculations, with the number of people he anticipates showing, that amount of beer is right. Ok. But why is he getting that much Mexican beer? With the amount of margaritas that will be drunk as well, that is too much. Especially too much Mexican beer.

My advice to him was simple. Get about 2 cases of Mexican beer. Make the rest of them Miller or Lite or your favorite beer. Why? People don't drink much of this on a regular basis. After they have gotten a buzz, they will return to the beer of choice. They may have 2 or 3 Tecates or Pacificos, but that is it. I would even bet that some people won't even try the Mexican beer. They will head straight for the domestics. Don't waste your money on beer that people will not drink a lot of.

Also, do not buy cheap tequila. You pretty much get what you pay for when it comes to liquor. If it not 100% blue agave, don't buy it. Yeah, you can get away with some cheap tequila for the margaritas but if you want people to really enjoy it and pop some shots, buy something that is good. If they are giving away a shot glass or t-shirt with purchase, chances are it is crap.

I will probably have a Pacifico and a Tecate. Add in a couple of margaritas and things should be good. Even better when I break his karoake machine. Hey, I don't know how that Corona got dumped into it.

I need a break

I am not sure what the heck that is floating in my coffee. Looks like it came from the cream I put in there. I will not be finishing that cup. That I do know.

I grabbed the trusted pipe wrench last night to fix the bath tub spout. It started spraying out the side the other day. After spending a week with it duck taped up (man's best friend), I had decided to take it off and replace it. Once I had the spout off I instantly knew I had a problem. It was not connected to a regular pipe like I had expected. It was connected to some special fitting.

The bath tub itself is the old style on legs. The plumbing is external; there is a stainless steel pipe that does from on top of the faucet up to the shower head, with a shower curtain surrounding the entire tub.

Once I looked at the fitting and noticed the 2 inch opening that it was, the only thought was that it may have to be entirely replaced. Shit! There goes more cash down the drain (no pun intended). I put the spout back on and it didn't appear to lead badly yesterday, but this morning there was a small river coming from underneath the tub. I think I will take another shot at it later today. I am hoping part of the issue is not having the spout on tight enough. I don't want to break the thing either so I need to be a bit careful with it. Plus, I do want to find out where the water is coming from exactly.

I have had issue with the faucet leaking in the past. Fixing it was no real big issue. It is old and I had considered replacing it. Just like I would like to replace the fixture in the rental unit as well. Looks like I will be getting one of them done now sooner than I expected.

What really sucks is the number of repair items I have had already this year. Between 2 vehicles and the house, I keep paying out to have things fixed. Can't I catch a break for a couple of months here? I mean, if I have to keep paying for this stuff, that sucks money from my Vegas fund. Can't have that!

Breaking news! Toto is coming to Summerfest! I want to hear about the rain in Africa. But damn, I will be out of town!

Choke!

Well, the Red Wings choked on a lead last night and got bounced from the NHL playoffs. Blew a 2 goal lead. So much for having the best record in the regular season. I am so disappointed.

I don't know why I do this. Every time I grab this shirt for work, it never crosses my mind. I think it is because the light isn't very bright in the bedroom. Got to keep it low for the ladies you know. But I put this shirt on just to notice the faint stain when I get to work. The stain doesn't stick out like a sore thumb but if you look at it, it comes into view like those blurry picture you had to stare at just to see the sailboat or dinosaur. I have tried to get the stain out but I think it is set in. Maybe it is a mental block. The shirt is just 3 months old in great condition. I am not tossing a 3 month shirt. Of course the stain always looks bigger and more pronounced after I notice in the restroom mirror. Now that my brain is locked in on the knowing the stain is there again it feels like I have a big neon arrow pointing at it whenever someone comes by.

Don't ask how it got there either. No idea what it might have been.

In a Summefest shocker, the BoDeans are not playing the Amphitheater? Background: Every year Summerfest relies on the BoDeans to fill in a spot at the Amphitheater when they cannot get anyone else to play. Over the last couple of years, they have signed them earlier than usual. They sell tickets so it works out well. I find it amusing because they can play in front of 20000 fans that night and then go back to playing in front of 1500 like they usually do. But I have faith in the lack of talent in the Summerfest offices. This show will be moved from the Miller Oasis to the Amphitheater when they can't get anyone.

So a lot of Cowboys fans were of the same mindset as I with the second rounding picking of a tight end. Few like it. But overall, many outlets gave the Cowboys a high C, low B grade. I thought they did solid C at best. ESPN gave them a B-. The Dallas Morning News gave them a C. And I am too lazy to find out what other outlets had to say. I didn't see anything from SI and USA Today had stupid rankings this year.

I am curious to know how you think your team did. Go ahead and state your team and the grade you would give them.

A nice blur of a weekend

Sometimes you just need a Sunday to lay around on the couch and do little except get up to move to the bathroom or the refrigerator. I think the carpet between couch and toilet is pretty worn out by now.

Parts of the weekend seem like a blur. Guess that can happen when you move from work to happy hour to late night shenanigans to waking up to shower for the NFL draft and another long session of hugging pitchers of beer.

Thus it was nice to just vegetate on a couch while it was cold and rainy outside. It was an enjoyable weekend. Can't wait to do it again. Just need to wait these 4 days out.

Nothing too exciting in terms of the Cowboys draft. Really. Not bad. Not great. Filled some needs, though I wasn't too excited about a tight end in the second round. Bad part was I think Philly did pretty good. It will be interesting to read all the draft grades that come out. Though they are meaningless, it isn't bad to get some thoughts on who your team just picked up. Of course, Dr Z should have his grades up for the draft from 3 years ago. That is one article worth reading.

Sometime this week I should have my latest piece of advice ready to go. I know you are all on the edge of your chair waiting in anticipation. All 8 of you that read this. But you will have to wait. This whole work concept is getting in the way now.

One more thing to add. Today there are going to be more rallies to support breaking the law. Illegal immigrant rallies will occur across the country again. One thing that caught my ear this morning was the boycott. Supposedly, all those supporting the illegals will not buy anything today to show the economic impact they have. Um...ok. there are a couple of problems here. If they do not buy anything today, what has stopped people from buying stuff yesterday to be prepared? So sales are down today but were up big yesterday or maybe tomorrow. That doesn't really show an impact. Further more, are they not hurting themselves? Wouldn't they most likely go to a ethnic store to purchase products? Easier to buy food and supplies by going to a Spanish run store than say the humogous SaveAllMart.

So let's hurt the hard working legal citizen who runs the restarant or corner store selling the pollo and chorizo. That makes a lot of sense.